Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Randomize
