I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
Randomize
