He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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