Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Randomize
