So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
Randomize
