It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
Randomize
