just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize
