I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
I just gave my mom some ones that look like they've probably been in some strippers cooter. Oops.
Haha. Just tell your mom not to smell them
Hey mom, most of this money I'm giving you is in ones. Don't ask why and whatever you do don't smell them.
Sounds legit to me.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
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