i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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