i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
Randomize
