Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
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