even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
