He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
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