My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
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