I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Randomize
