meet me in the bathroom in 10 mins.
wait what? who are you hooking up with in the bathroom?!
aww shit wrong text.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
i used baking grease as lip gloss
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize
