Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
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