you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
Randomize
