the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
Randomize
