So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
Randomize
