I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
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