Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
Randomize
