don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
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