i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
Randomize
