Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
I got 87 likes on my changed relationship status. It's official. I'm way more fucking awesome single.
They're mostly guys
Early bird gets the worm.
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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