Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
so my daughter wakes me up this morning and i feel like a vibration so im thinking she has my phone..nope my vibrator
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
