Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
Randomize
