she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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