dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
Randomize
