So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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