I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
third nipple confirmed
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
Randomize
