i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
and I'm going to name my autobiography "blow jobs with enthusiasm are the best"
I'm naming my autobiography "Reasons Not to Date Girls From Texas."
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
COCAINE IS GR8
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Randomize