i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
Randomize
