I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Randomize
