I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
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