guys are only as good as the porn they watch
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
