Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
Randomize