none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
Randomize
