Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
I took your shirt off for you after you threw up on yourself, read you the ugly duckling, and then tucked you in. you better fucking love me, jackass.
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
Randomize
