do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
Randomize
