We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
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