just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
I wish life had little blips of pornography
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
I have tasted many bathrooms
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
Randomize
