she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
Randomize
