i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
Randomize
