Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
Me too!
the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
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