I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
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