My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
Randomize
