I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
I am one with the molecules
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
Randomize
