Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
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