don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
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